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‘I asked you to get the nursery ready,’ she said softly. ‘Weeks ago. You refused.’
It is an empty room, Kate. It is an empty room and it is destroying us both.
How do you think I feel? I was the one who carried him in my belly. He lived inside me, he kicked and moved, and then he came into the world and… he was gone.
‘So what? Do you want to leave the nursery waiting for their spirits like this? As some kind of macabre tribute?’ She waved her hand. ‘That is exactly why I cannot stay here any longer.’
She picked up her suitcase and walked to the door.
He stopped at the threshold.
‘I called a real estate agent,’ he said. ‘I want to put the house up for sale.’
“Nee!”
“Oh my God, Kate! You can’t stay here alone.”
He cast me a sideways glance.
That one look carried countless accusations and judgments.
‘I’ll come back next week for the rest of my things,’ he said.
“You can’t take my house away!” I screamed as he walked away.
The front door closed behind him with a soft click.
I went to Noah’s room.
Sitting on the floor next to the cradle, I rested my forehead against the wooden bars.
‘I’m sorry, honey,’ I whispered. ‘I would have given anything to have you here.’
The mobile hanging above the cradle moved gently in the air flowing in through the ventilation grille.
That evening, I ate snacks standing by the kitchen sink.
I left the television turned off.
I ignored my mother’s third phone call.
On my way to bed, I walked past the nursery without looking inside.
I lay down on the side of the mattress where Thomas was lying.
No tears flowed, but sleep refused to come either.
