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She said it gently, almost delicately, as if I were making too much of it. Perhaps that was the first moment something changed, though I didn’t recognize it then.
The closer the wedding got, the stranger Claire became.
One night, the four of us were sitting around my parents’ dining room table eating stew when Claire suddenly put down her fork and stared at me.
“You should reconsider marrying him, Alice.”
My mother froze, holding the glass halfway to her lips.
“What?” I laughed because I honestly thought he was joking.
Claire didn’t smile. “I mean it.”
The heat rose to my face. “What’s wrong with you?”
Mom immediately retorted, “Just because your sister has found someone decent doesn’t mean you have the right to ruin it, Claire.”
Claire’s expression shifted to that old family wound: the one she had carried after being labeled “the difficult one” so many times that it had practically become part of her identity.
“I’m not trying to ruin anything,” she replied.
Dad moved away from the table. “Then stop talking like that.”
Claire got up, left, and her bedroom door slammed shut in the hallway. No one followed her. I sat there as my parents turned their warning into bitterness, jealousy, and Claire’s simple attitude.
The following night was my bachelorette party. Balloons. Sparkling cocktails. Too much pink. I was trying to fully enjoy my happiness when Claire arrived late, rain still clinging to her hair and dressed in her work clothes.
He found me by the bar. “Alice,” he said, looking impatient, “cancel the wedding.”
I stared at her. “What did you just say?”
“Please. Cancel it.”
“Because?”
“I can’t explain it right now.”
I felt every head in the room turn toward us. “So you came here to ruin my night for fun?”
Claire grabbed my wrist. “Please, listen to me…”
I jerked my arm away. “You’re jealous. You can’t stand that I’ve finally got something good.”
I saw how the words affected her.
Claire’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m trying to stop you from making a mistake, Ally.”
“Then say what you want to say.”
She shook her head. “I can’t. Not yet.”
I pointed toward the door. “Then go.”
She did it.
And that was the last thing I said to my sister while she was still alive to answer me.
My wedding day began radiant and beautiful.
The church smelled of lilies and candle wax. Ryan waited at the altar, calm and serene. Afterward, everyone headed downtown to the restaurant where the reception would be held.
I kept looking toward the entrance, but Claire never appeared. I called her several times, but all the calls went straight to voicemail.
My father insisted I was upset and that it would calm down with time. My mother told me not to let it ruin my day. So I smiled at my cousins, thanked them for the gifts, and pretended my stomach wasn’t churning.
An hour passed. Then my mother’s phone rang.
She listened for several seconds before turning pale and covering her mouth with her hand. “There was a loud crash,” she whispered.
For a moment, no one seemed able to move. Then, the chairs were abruptly pushed back, the car keys appeared, and suddenly we all ran out before the call had even ended.
It started to rain during the journey. A torrential downpour fell from side to side across the road, turning the headlights into blurry smudges.
The rescue teams were still searching when we arrived. Flashlights illuminated the riverbank. Mud soaked the hem of my wedding dress.
Claire had taken a different route, a shortcut along the river. Her car went off the road and fell into the water.
The next day they found her body, and instead of a honeymoon, there was a funeral. Black dresses. Casseroles covering the kitchen counters. People saying, “She knew you loved her,” with that terrible, soft certainty people use when they have nothing useful to say.
And yet, one thought kept lingering in my mind.
Claire had been trying to tell me something.
A week later, Ryan left for work. Twenty minutes after he left, my phone rang.
“Megan?” I replied, surprised.
Megan was Claire’s best friend at work, a woman I had only seen twice but who I liked immediately because she spoke to Claire without flinching.
Her voice sounded tense. “Alice, I need you to come to the office right now.”
“Because?”
Continued on the next page
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